Who's Shoes?

I learned something the other day… or maybe I already knew, but it just really sank in… It’s about that saying, “You never really know a man until you stand in his shoes”. I realized how true that is just this week.

I have been hearing this lady make comments about her frustrations with people because they don’t report to her as soon as she beckons. I have heard her take the attention to herself when a conversation is held about a co-worker who is battling and illness. I have noticed that she likes to compare everyone else’s situation to her own.

She seems so very upset and offended when co-workers do certain things that are not convenient for her own schedule. It seems as though she feels like they should all operate and respond based on her own preferences.

The thing that she seems to be forgetting is that people have their own lives going on, too. Mr. Joe might not be able to report to see me right at the very minute I ask him to because: a) he has a different work schedule than I; b) he may have an appointment or an emergency or other timeline that is of a higher priority than coming to see me immediately.

There are days that some people approach the office with a less-than-cheery attitude and she seems offended by that, as well. Well, Mr. Joe might be less-talkative today than usual because: a) he is tired; b) upset or stressed about a personal situation in his own life; c) not happy about hearing the comments previously made about his less-than-urgent approach to report to the office, as previously demanded.

I have heard some opinions shared regarding her family or friends who have said things like, “You don’t know what I’ve been through.” And I have heard her response, “Well, you don’t know what I’ve been through.” What does that even mean? Somehow, her struggles were bigger or hold more value than the struggles of others? How does she even know that?

You never know every single struggle that a person has overcome… only God knows every single struggle and every single accomplishment. And only God can pass judgment on your behavior.

I don’t get to decide that you have no reason to be in a bad mood or not so friendly today. You might have a perfectly good reason for it. It is your responsibility to manage your stress so that it doesn’t affect everyone else. We go to God for that.

Romans 2:1-3, “Therefore you have no excuse, O man, every one of you who judges. For in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, practice the very same things. We know that the judgment of God rightly falls on those who practice such things. Do you suppose, O man—you who judge those who practice such things and yet do them yourself—that you will escape the judgment of God?”

Have you ever experienced pain or sadness, only to realize someone has it or has had it worse than you? Do you feel guilty that you are struggling? Did it occur to you that it might hurt you a lot because in your own personal life (not everyone else’s), that thing is the worst pain or sadness you personally have been through? We aren’t supposed to compare ourselves to other people. We are supposed to strive for the best and the best is God. We should be like avatars of Christ, not like mean human people. (Props for Avatar… good movie, with way more pronounced worldly struggles and a different type of god-ish being, which, of course, is their god and not ours because ours is real and super awesome.)

So, back to this lady… the funny thing about her is that she is a professed Christian. I don’t know about you, but it seems to me like she isn’t quite the avatar of Christ. She is busy complaining about her own shoes, which are usually pretty cute, instead of bothering to see the wear and tear on other people’s shoes. I really doubt she would put her feet in their shoes because: a) they might stink; b) they might be too big or too small; or c) they might hurt really bad. The point is that she has no idea where those other shoes have been and given the opportunity to try them on, I’m quite sure she would decline.

Luke 6:37, “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven;”

Now declining to try on other people’s shoes is perfectly okay… because sometimes that’s gross or uncomfortable. That’s why they are the other person’s shoes. But to complain about their shoes when you don’t know why they are wearing them and you haven’t experienced for yourself where they have been is the part that isn’t okay. Forgive the shoes of others for their ugliness, dirtiness, or lack of excitement for the day and move on. Then, try your darndest to build them up and help them clean their shoes a little.

Ephesians 4:29, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”